


You're Doing It All Wrong

by bgn846



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Cuddling, French Kiss, Gen, Gladnis, Hugging, Its hard to catch Ignis, M/M, Making Out, Teasing, how not to french kiss, ignis has a text war with gladio, ignis is salty when he wants to be, sometimes iggy acts his age
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2019-06-08 03:39:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15234510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bgn846/pseuds/bgn846
Summary: Ignis overhears a discussion between Prompto and Noctis regarding the wrong way to french kiss and decides to have a little fun with Gladio via text.





	You're Doing It All Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> I recently had a discussion about french kissing and ended up googling it just to find out what the masses opinion was. Needless to say this weird little drabble was born. It wasn't supposed to be long but every time I tried stopping, it just kept going o _ o and obviously you all can kiss how ever you all like! :)

Prompto’s excited voice cut through the haze that Ignis was in as he was fixing dinner in Noct’s apartment.   He looked up but realized he wasn’t being directly addressed.  Noct and Prompto were seated on the sofa having a heated discussion about something but it was most likely juvenile. 

“That is not how you do that.”  Prompto huffed.

“Says who? Like you would know… how much experience do you have with that anyway?!” As Noctis snarky reply filled the room.    

“Hey!  I may not be the most amazing guy about town but I have French kissed someone before and I know what it’s _not_ supposed to be.”

“Oh do tell, inquiring minds want to know.” As bright blue eyes bored into him with a smirk. 

The blonde sighed and started to describe the mistakes that can be made while executing the perfect French kiss.  “Well… no teeth clacking if possible, no super sloppy tongue outside the mouth, no digging for gold under your molars, and not being too forceful.” 

“Did you moogle that or did you actually have enough talent to get that right naturally?” Noct asked with a raised eyebrow.

From where they were sitting on the couch Ignis couldn’t see Prompto’s face but he suspected he was turning a slightly rosy shade by this point.  He did hear the exasperated sigh he made as he answered.

“Fine!  Maybe I moogled it first so I could get it right the first time.  There is nothing wrong with being prepared, you study for stuff all the time why is kissing any different.”

Ignis could see Nocts face and he opened his mouth to say something but changed his mind and just waved his hand at Prompto dismissing the idea. 

“Can we just go back to playing the game Noct, I don’t like it when you make fun of me.” The blonde said softly.

Noct’s expression faded into something sweeter almost instantly and he reached out and put an arm around Prompto’s shoulders and smiled.  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you; I was just having some fun.  Relax kay?”

That was all Prompto needed to snap out of his stupor and he leaned into Noct a bit as a sign of thanks.  Two seconds later they were destroying things in their game with a youthful vengeance.  Ignis was still in the kitchen pondering the exchange between the two teens.    

He was half way done with his task but he fished his phone out of his pants pocket and shot a message off to the shield.

**Ignis ( 5:35 PM):** _I wished to inform you that you are doing something incorrectly._

He smiled and put his phone on the counter should it ding in response. 

 

* * *

 

 

Gladio was still stuck in a meeting regarding some crownsguard business.  Thankfully his part had come and gone so he could relax a bit and just try and pay attention to the remainder.   He felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he slowly dug it out to check. 

He just stared at the screen reading the message from Ignis.  What the hell was Ignis talking about; he was trying to think of anything at all he could have been referring to.  Gladio laid the phone in his lap as he gave it further thought.  Eventually he gave up and shot back a message.

**Gladiolus (5:45 PM):** _Um what exactly have I messed up?_

The reply was almost immediate.

**Ignis (5:46 PM):** _I’m truly shocked that this has come to light… especially from you Gladio._

Gladio’s chest started to feel a little tight this was sounding serious. 

**Gladiolus (5:48 PM):** _Well I really don’t know.  Care to enlighten me? I can’t call I’m in a meeting still._

**Ignis (5:50 PM):** _I’m afraid this really shouldn’t be discussed via text, I should wait until I see you later._

Gladio had to work hard to stifle the indignant huff that came out his mouth once Ignis’ message had come through.  He was already tired from a long day and this meeting wasn’t helping.  Now with Ignis heaping something else on top he wasn’t sure he could wait any longer.

**Gladiolus (5:52 PM):** _Please…. I’m not sure I can handle the wait.  I’m literally starting to sweat in this meeting and the air is on full blast, they’ll think I’m sick or something._

**Ignis (5:53 PM):** _You should feel sick, for doing this wrong._

Ignis was maybe starting to feel slightly guilty but he was just having too much fun.   He did want to put the shield out his misery.  He received another message and could only hold out for another five minutes before he clarified his meaning.

**Gladiolus (5:54 PM):** _Iggy, I’m begging you. Please. Tell me._

Gladio was thoroughly distracted from the rest of the meeting.  He was sure he looked like he was sitting on hot coals with the amount he was shifting in his seat.  Only through a stroke of luck did no one seem to notice his personal hell.  His phone finally buzzed and he took a deep breath before he unlocked it to check the message.

**Ignis (6:03 PM):** _Very well. You are french kissing incorrectly._

**Ignis (6:03 PM):** _This is a very egregious error and should be rectified immediately._

All the breath left Gladio’s lungs as he composed himself.  Ingis usually never teased him using text so this exchange had been unexpected and had really rattled him. 

**Gladiolus (6:06 PM):** _I’ve had a heart attack and can no longer communicate.  Send my love to my family for me._

Ignis burst out laughing when he read the message.  Noctis even noticed and looked up for a split second.

“You alright Specs?” 

“Hmmm… peachy.  I’m just laughing at a joke.  Highness your attention is needed otherwise you’ll die.” As Ignis indicated the screen with a tilt of his head.   Noctis quickly turned away and was distracted once again.   

**Ignis (6:09 PM _):_** _Well before your funeral I suggest a lesson is in order.  You must be re-schooled in this fine art.  I can’t abide in the knowledge that you are lacking in any skillset._

Ignis finished up with his prep and had all things simmering or in the oven for dinner.  Time was dragging and he was starting to worry that perhaps Gladio wasn’t going to grace him with a reply until after the meeting had ended.

**Gladiolus (6:20 PM):** _I’ve been reanimated somehow.  So how have you come by this knowledge anyway?_

**Ignis (6:22 PM):** _My source isn’t reputable, but I believe the logic is sound._

**Gladiolus (6:23 PM):** _Hmmm interesting.  My place or yours?_

**Ignis (6:24 PM):** _Well I’ve delayed dinner a bit, the kids are distracted blowing things up.  You should come over here for food and then we can go to my place after._

**Gladiolus (6:26 PM):** _Sounds like a plan.  I should be there in about 15 minutes.  What are we having?_

**Ignis (6:28 PM):** _Casserole and asparagus.   But that’s not important.  Your lesson is.  Hurry it up._  

Gladio couldn’t help but smirk as he read the last message.  Ignis reserved his mock impatience for him and him alone.  It made him feel special that he could act that way with him.

Ignis was unable to watch his phone for much longer as the food was now ready and he began to set the table.  He would let the prince and Prompto play on for a little while more so he could kill time.  A timer went off in the kitchen and he ran back in to check.  He had baked bread and needed to rescue it from the oven.

He was so engrossed in admiring his handy work with the loaf of bread he didn’t hear Prompto’s greeting to the shield as he passed through the living room.  He suddenly felt two arms wrapping around him pinning his arms to his side and hugging tight.

A gravelly voice whispered in his ear. “You are such a little shit sometimes.”

Ignis smiled “You love it.”

“Yeah, but you’re still a shit.”

“Well use the training you do have and cut that bread up for me.” As Ignis wiggled his way out of Gladio’s grasp.

“You are so going to get it later.”

“Again. You. Love. It.” 

“Now I’m going to have to figure out what inexplicable thing to text you about during your next meeting with the King!”

Ignis narrowed his eyes and wagged his finger at Gladio. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Why not? You did.”

“That’s different, I’m allowed.”

“On what grounds, exactly?”

“None, I just am.  Deal with it. I don’t have to have a logical reason for everything I do in my life do I?”

“Well yeah you do, it’s your job!”

“Minor detail.” Ignis huffed as he turned around to grab silverware from the drawer. 

Gladio quickly reached out and smacked Ignis’ ass hard enough to get a yelp out of him. 

“Ignis!  Are you okay in there? You didn’t drop dinner or something did you?!”  The prince wasn’t looking at them he was still trying to not die but he was concerned none the less.

Gladio just burst out laughing and went to catch Ignis again but he scooted around the small kitchen managing to avoid being captured.  He went to grab the sliced bread and was finally intercepted by the shield.  He was shoved into the counter and strong tattooed arms were around him once again. “Fine, I won’t get you back, but I expect your little lesson to more than make up for your salty text war earlier.” 

Ignis smiled at him breathing slightly harder than normal from their small game. “Very well, let’s eat, the sooner that task is done the sooner we can leave.”

Gladio backed off instantly and snatched the bread out of his hands and ran out of the kitchen depositing it on the table.  Then he went over to the couch to physically grab Prompto and heft him over to the table by his waist.

“Whoa big guy!  Let me save my place hold on.” The blonde squealed.  

Noct was laughing and quickly saved the game.  “Good I was starving.  What time is it anyway?”

Ignis appeared from the kitchen and made some incoherent babbling noise as he placed a plate in front of his charge.  “Never you mind what the time it is, enjoy your vegetable free dinner, won’t you.”

Gladio had never seen Noct eat so fast.  He smirked at Ignis knowing full well what he was up to.  Once the dishes were done, perhaps with more haste then usual the pair were able to bid the prince and the blonde goodnight. 

“Hey Iggy, who exactly was your source anyway?”  Gladio asked once they were in the elevator.

“Prompto.”  Ignis grinned “Which is why I really need to verify the validity of the data, though I believe he used moogle.” 

Gladio just looked at Ignis and shook his head while laughing.  “Prompto’s a smart kid, I have a feeling his research will be spot on.”

“Well then don’t keep me waiting.” As Ignis started to sprint towards his car once the elevator doors dinged open.

Gladio just managed to make it into the passenger seat before Ignis had it in gear and was backing out.  He looked over at Ignis and he had a wolfish grin on his face as he navigated the parking garage.  He was having fun.  It was nice to see him act more like his actual age every once and awhile.

It didn’t take long for them to reach Ingis’ apartment building and not so calmly walk to his front door. Once they were inside Gladio wasted no time and the second the door was closed and bolted he lunged at Ignis again. 

Ignis’ training sessions were paying off because he just slipped right out of Gladio’s path and had him chasing him around the entire apartment. 

Gladio was breathing heavily and looking at Ignis from across the small table in his living room that was currently dividing them.  “Iggy what did you smoke today?  You’re in a rare mood.”

“Eh, guess I’m just happy.” 

“No reason?”

“No. Just having a moment is all.  Would you prefer me stop?”

“Hell NO.  I wish you acted like this more often, it’s fun.”   Gladio responded finally catching his breath.

“Well then catch me so I can give you that lesson.” He said with a glint in his eye.

Gladio had to work hard for his prize.  After another ten minutes he was finally able to corner the advisor and cage him with his arms against the wall.  He knew he could slip away again if he really wanted to but he hoped he would want to do something else instead.

“So your first lesson.” Ignis gasped catching his breath as he leaned in and kissed Gladio gently on the lips and then inserted his tongue a little and smoothly worked his way around his lips and mouth.  The shield reciprocated the action and was kissing back but not with his usual veracity.  Gladio was not doing any of the things that Prompto had listed off earlier that night. 

Ignis pulled away which was difficult since his head was only inches from the wall.  “You’re kissing me differently. What happened?”

“Prompto isn’t the only one that can moogle shit and I had a more time to kill in that meeting after we stopped talking.” Gladio cheekily responded.  “Wanna know what else I moogled?”  As he leaned down to grab Ignis at his waist and sling him over his shoulder.  

Ignis tettered on Gladio’s tall frame and braced himself to keep from tumbling off.  Gladio wandered over to the couch and swung Ignis back down on his back and collapsed on top of him. 

“OOOF! Trying to squash me?”

“Nah, just keeping you from running around again, you’re a hard guy to catch when you want to be.” Gladio huffed with a smile.

“Well then let’s get back to the lesson shall we?”  

“Such a shit you are, I think you are picking up bad habits from Noct, I thought it was supposed to be the other way around!”

Ignis rolled his eyes. “Blah, blah, blah… less talk and more action please.”  He opened his mouth to add something more but Gladio just kissed him again. 

After a moment he came up for air and stared at Ignis. “Did Nocts dinner really not have any vegetables in it?”

“Are you kidding me of course it did, I just pureed the shit out of them and mixed it into the fresh pasta dough before I made noodles.  I do have my tricks.”

“You are too much sometimes Iggy.  Don’t ever change.”

Ignis smiled as he hugged Gladio and looked up at him.  “Anything for you.”


End file.
